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One for the history books

January 28, 2011

“Journalism can never be silent: that is its greatest virtue and its greatest fault. It must speak, and speak immediately, while the echoes of wonder, the claims of triumph and the signs of horror are still in the air.”

–  Henry Anatole Grunwald

A majestic quote that reminds us of the power of the written word. ‘The first draft of history,’ is also fantastic phrase that describes journalism. Ah yes – rooting out corruption, exposing the guilty, redeeming the innocent – journalism is truly a noble pursuit.

So please tell me why for the love of God there is an article on the front page of CNN about pregnant Kate Hudson, who just so happens to think that the alien spawn growing inside her, ‘feels like a girl.’ Just to repeat – one of the biggest news websites in the world, on its front page, is featuring a story about a woman and literally what she feels about her unborn child. And you just know if it is a girl, they’ll link to this damn article and say, “What are the odds! This is CNN, reporting live from a placenta-soaked operating room. Film at 11.”

There looks like what could become a very disgusting pun in the fake CNN reporter quote I just made up, but I am mature, and will refrain.

Here’s a question – what does it take to get your thoughts and feelings posted on CNN if your thoughts and feelings are irrelevant? Do I need a publicist to represent me? How much would that cost?

Why should you have Ben on the show? Well I’ll tell you Piers – Ben had a sandwich today.”

“He had WHAT? What kind was it?”

“I don’t know Piers – my boy Ben is a wild card. Don’t you need someone to interview tonight?”

“Yes, God YES! Was there ham on his sandwich? Tell me there was ham.”

“Could be, Piers, could be…”

“Screw the Kardashians, book this publicist’s client on my show, NOW!”

Don’t get me started on the Kardashians.

Additionally, I should mention Kate Hudson is unmarried. Her kid’s baby daddy is her boyfriend who she has no plans to marry.

Tell me – if you met a thirty-one year old woman (who already has a seven-year old child who thinks Kate’s fetus is a girl also) that was thrilled that her boyfriend got her pregnant and that they had no intention of getting married* – how would you react? Would you celebrate? Would you call CNN?

Or would you call Family Services?


* And P.S. – why does possessing money and fame grant you immunity to certain social norms designed to provide children with stable family backgrounds?

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